I think you're smart enough to figure out what this blog is going to be about. But, on the off chance you don't, I'll tell you. It's about me being totally freaked out and scared of the future. I'm going to be a senior this year so its time to think about it, freaked out or not...
Well, for starters, I don't really have any idea of what I want to do. I love art and photography and i think it would be totally awesome if I could be a photographer for some magazine and travel all over the world to take pictures of nature, you know, things God's made and formed with His own hands... and then to get PAID to do it... WOW that would be awesome. But, like I've told some people, I haven't really talked to the Big Man Upstairs about it so I'm not sure if that's what I'm going to do.
And then there's college. Which college? What's my major supposed to be? What am I going to study etc.... Questions like these are flooding my mind and I've been shoving them all to this corner of my mind, too scared to approach the answers.
After those questions flood my mind, more questions about Paying for college come up. I've talked to my dad about going into the Air Nat. Guard and stuff like that and I've been pretty excited about it until tonight. He called me, saying "I've just spent three hours with Jared (a friend of ours who's been in the ANG for 4 years now) and we have your life planned out for you." This statement alone scared me... Wait a second, I dont' get a say in it???? and then another question popped in my head, "What about God? Doesn't He get a say in what His creation is going to do?" and I took the phone from my mouth and tried to catch my breath and hold back some tears...
It dawned on me that the future was heading my way, and not just heading my way at the pace I want it to come, but at the speed of a lighting bolt compared to how fast I want to grow up... I realized I need to get focused. I need to get focused on what God wants me to do. on what He needs me to do for His kingdom. I need to change a lot of things in my life to do so too but I can't do that without the strength that Christ gives me, not only to change, but to resist temptation when I am trying to change...
Here come the prayer requests...
- I can change with Jesus' help, or let Him do it entirely if that's what it takes.
- I get my questions answered in the time they need to be answered, not the time i want them answered.
- I don't let my life fall back to where I have been.
Thanks a lot guys... love you all!!!
